Marilyn and Sean... ... I enjoyed reading your stories/ posts, so happy for you both ...

Late Reunion

Toronto, Canada

Marilyn and Sean - thanks so much for telling your beautiful story! It has inspired me (as I wipe the tears). I am a 63 year-old adoptee. I met my wonderful birth mother last year (age 86) after a 25 year search. We spent an incredible six hours together, and it was as if we had known each other for all those years. Since then, we have been speaking by phone and emailing frequently. Geography keeps us apart (4500 km); but it gives us time to slowly build our relationship and trust. By sharing your incredible journey, you give me the strength and hope to continue our very important conversation and evolving reunion. Best wishes.

I loved the story from all perspectives - it has helped me tremendously.

Texas

I am an adoptee - born 4/16/1986. It was a closed adoption and I have wanted to search for my bfamily my whole life. Since turning 18, I was told it would cost a pretty penny and have just not had the extra money. I\'ve just found out I can petition the court in my county to get my records - I should have them this week, and begin my own search.

Learning what a bmother feels/thinks has helped me out. I wonder often if she thinks of me or wonders where I am/who I am/what I\'m like. I am glad you two got along so well - thank you for sharing.

Comforting

Sydney, Australia

yes

I am an adoptee who has been on a long journey with my bio mum since she found me when I was 18. I am now 34 and have two children of my own and to this day we still have not met. We are in contact and planning to meet very soon. I am finding the journey difficult. I do not know this person and cannot assume to know what she is thinking or how she feels. I struggle with not wanting to be a burden to her versus needing now to fill this void in my life. Your story brings me comfort and hope. Thankyou.

I am glad you posted this.

Indiana

I gave up my first son in a closed adoption in 1986. I had not heard of open adoption or I might have chosen that option. I always wanted some assurance or proof that my first son was OK. Hoped he was happy, healthy and well adjusted. My second son has issues that my extended family blames on me. Much as I long to know that my first son is OK, I cannot search for him. There is no possible answer that will heal the wounds of losing one son to adoption and another son to drugs.

This is exactly what I needed at this time. My bson just found me this past April, and things are going very well. We both want long term relationship but like Marilyn I have fears of it fizzling.

Mississippi

This has encouraged me to think positively about our future. I'm so thankful for your work here.

yes

This was very helpful, encouraging,and hope inspiring. It's so good to know these unconventional, out of the box relationships can work with effort and determination on both sides.

I'm not sure I like this

Florida

Want to adopt

Unfortunately, yes

Thank you for sharing your story, but to be frank it made me sick to my stomach. It's tragically discouraged me from from wanting to adopt. I can't think of anything more wonderful than than adopting a child and loving them as my own, but nothing worse than having a complete stranger swoop in to plant their talons into them as though they had some special claim.

Informing your birth son about possible medical predispositions is one thing, but trying to create an enduring relationship with him? It seems like an exceedingly self-absorbed thing to do, evidenced by the fact that you spent approximately 1 sentence talking about the adoptive parents--- the real parents--- who raised him and earned the right to love him. Sean isn't your son. He never was and it's nothing but selfish to assume that he is.

Great article. I can relate to a lot of it.

California

I was adopted in 1938, and found my birth family in 2000.

I could write several pages on my own reunion. It too was a sucess. I did not use search angels or lawyers mainly because I am to stubborn, and I wanted to do it myself.

I thought this was amazing and so wonderfully written

England

I was adopted at 6 weeks old in 1969

Thank you for sharing your reunion experiences, lovely to read. I contacted my birth mother when I was 22, we exchanged letters and we met, also met my half brother and half sister, our letters got fewer and we lost contact in 1995. I recently found my half sister on Facebook and made contact, we have changed so much and are now mums ourselves. I also have contact with my half brother and my birth mother. Taking it slowly but it's good. xx

Such a lovely story

england

birthmother just made contact with 25 year old son

yes

Your story was great to read, I have just made contact with my 25 year old birthson. We havent met yet and I am really mindful that I need to go at his pace but Im worried about my own emotions taking over and scaring him off so it was good to read that you had this and got through it. Its so comforting to know you can build a solid relationship, I totally know how Mailyn felt, I sadly havent been able to have any more children, I was also 15 when I got pregnant. I have photos of my son and his baby and girlfriend and a letter which stopped me worrying he had suffered for being adopted. It all sounds quite similar to your situation, I am excited and scared half to death but I feel so much better already for having found out what happened to him, anything else will be a bonus. Good luck to you both for the future and may your bond grow ever closer, thank you for sharing, maybe James and I will do the same some day :)

I like your websight very much

British Columbia

No, not really

Pretty Much

Thank you for your website, it is much needed. As a recovering adoptee I very much enjoy reading of others experiences and thoughts. My experiences with adoption and reunion were not pleasent, so it nice to hear that there is success every once in a while.

I am glad you have done this.

Massachusetts

I am 42 y.o., adopted as an infant an reunited with my birth mom this month. I have an aunt, 3 sibs, nephews and a niece. It has been amazing. I feel so crazy connected and loved, but definitely have moments of being overwhelmed. It is amazing to me how easily I have connected and how right these relationships feel. I definitely am looking for support along the way to quell some of the nerves. Thanks for being there.

OMG, very awesome.

Virginia

I gave my son up for adoption in 1975 - just this year I was contacted by the agency that he wants to get in touch with me. As you mentioned, what a wave of emotions I have been going through. We have sent several letters back and forth and I am overjoyed. Thanks for your site to give me some support through this time.

Story I needed to read right now.

Fort Frances, ON, Canada

I just added son I gave up at birth to my Facebook last week.

I am excited; but also scared, he's now 18, old enough to either want to learn more or not want to. I have prayed for this for years.

A great story

Florida

I just want to say that your story is very heart warming. I have a search being conducted right now for my daughter that is 37 years old. I pray that she will be found and she will be receptive to the person that finds her and is willing to spend the rest of her life sharing our lives together. Thanks for your story. Joan

I think the reunion is awesome

Texas

I gave up my son at birth I have in the last 2 wks went through the adoption agency to locate him I had been looking for a long while before, They say they have sent him a letter and I am terrified that he will not want anything to do with me. I know how it feels to be that birthmom and all the heartache that goes with that decision. Please pray that he will be open to talking with me thanks for your story Barbara

Canadian Council of Natural Mothers

support for birthfamilies and adoptees

I think the mother/child bond should never be severed by people or politics

Ontario Canada

Participated in a Documentary "The 40 Year Secret" on CBC Jan 2010

yes very well

Very similar to my reunion with my son Kevin (I named Sean) born 1966
We reunited April 3, 2004 after I searched determindly for 18 years. I lost 38 years of his life but have gained four fold in the time since that first call in 2004. Like a dog with a bone, I was not going to quit until I found him.
My only regret is the rejection of me and his sisters by his adopted family.
The mixed message Kevin has received is that he has the right to know where he came from but the adoptive Mom and brother have no interest in participating. This was a shock because I was almost as eager to meet them as I was my son. Now he bears the burdon of juggling two families without offending either one.
I love him now and I loved him then. It's so hard for the child to comprehend how a stranger could love them but it is so easy for us Moms.
Congratulations and all the best,
Barb Estabrooks

My Adoption Story

I liked your site a lot

WA

yes

Since I turned 18 this past year I have been thinking about reuniting with my birth - mother. It was helpful to read both of your point of views. Thanks for sharing your story!