How about the Lisburn couple who wrote to a hotel in Blackpool and asked to reserve a room for the twelfth week of July. The Hotel owner wrote back that July only had four weeks!
Donald

You know yer man!! Yer man who's married onto yer woman!! Ach him! Why didn't ye say.

As I was walkin down the street ah met a mon
says he to me "is that you?"
says I "who?"
says he "you!"
says I "Me!"
says he "Yes!"
says I "No!"
Says he "Well..It's awful like ya!"

Maureen,

Childhood friends of mine were trying to teach their little brother proper speech. They'd been teaching him to say "Yes" instead of "Aye". So, in order to show off little brother's command of the language, they prompted him: " Our wee Willie can say yes can't you Willie?" Wee Willie replied "Aye!"

This is true!!

Lady D

Not only the Nornirish have a dialect, also the Scotch. I remember my Grandmother telling me about the time a neighbour was " waiting on " ( dying ) at Lisnatrunk and Scotch relations were sent for to be present when he died and for the fureral. The patient lingered on and on and my Granny when she met one of the Scotch relations inquired about the neighbour. She received the answer " He,s still livin,he canny go till his time comes!"
On the same occasion my great uncle Ned, passing the Scotch people on the forty ones,the evening being cold and wet , greeted them , " it,s a coorse nite!" One asked the other " What does he mean!"
Donald

Donald,

I don't mean to be contradictory, but it should be "Scots" or Scottish not Scotch when referring to people from Scotland. I tell you this because my best friend over here is Scottish, and gave me a right telling off many years ago when I used the term "Scotch". I quote" Ach Willie I aye a Scot, no Scotch, mine ye I like a wee dram, specially a single malt"

Beano

Thanks for the tip Beano
Donald