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At the bottom of my fairly thick file, is a report dated 16 August 1996 which was given to me two days later on this day thirteen years ago; a report that change my life considerably. That report said that I had prostate cancer and the urologist, waving his digit aloft said that the finger never lied. The memory of that triumphal announcement, that he was right and I had what I assumed was an inevitably fatal disease, is as clear today as the shock my wife and I felt then. Knowing that hundreds of thousands of men receive the same fearful news every year is what keeps me tuned in to Lists like these, hoping that I can, in some small way help these worried people to a calmer place where they can make a decision that suits them best instead of rushing, often panic stricken, into the first option presented to them.
The choices I have made for myself in the time that has elapsed since that memorable day is not one that most people are comfortable with and I have never suggested that anyone should make the same decision. What has worked for me is not for everyone and is not without risk.
So I write this note today not to encourage people to follow me, but to highlight yet again that there is indeed a life after a prostate cancer diagnosis. At the time I heard the word ‘cancer’ applied to me, I could not have believed that my darling wife and I would have done what we have done, that we would have celebrated the marriage of our son, that we would have experienced the joy of seeing our grandchildren grow, that we would have had such wonderful experiences, as we have travelled the world. We have indeed been fortunate and hope to have many more years together.
Sadly, our experiences are not those of all men diagnosed with this disease. Too many of the men I have met over the years have passed one, but even those men with a diagnosis of a more aggressive disease than mine have often made the most of the limited time available to them. The ‘intimation of mortality’ helps many to focus on what is important in their lives – it certainly helped me.
And CONGRATULATIONS on reaching yet another major milestone in your life.
What you have said there is all so very true.
I wonder how many of us would have fared as well if we hadn't had a site like your own YANA to inform us, reassure us, inspire us, and most of all - give us real HOPE.
I thank my lucky stars that Yana was the first site that really grabbed my attention after my own 'memorable date' in early 2005.
I realised there were others sharing exactly the same experience as I was at that time.
Yana -The name says is all. YOU ARE NOT ALONE.
Here's to the 25th anniversary of your diagnosis, Terry, and THANK YOU for everything.
Congratulations Terry!!!!!! And many more we all hope. You truly have made a difference in SO many lives with your work here. Knowledge helps get rid of fear and your site has done that for me.
Lee
Terry:
It's a fantastic thing that you've done with YANA. Like George this was the first place I found that gave me hope. I'm only a few months into my diagnosis, but I'm very much hoping to be posting something similar to yours in quite a few years time.
Your route has been a singular one, but one taken only after rigorous research and sensible consideration. That's the lesson I take from it.
Aug 18, 2008.....Terry, an interesting side note that I am a year today finding out that I had Prostate cancer as well. I "celebrated" the day for the both of us by fishing for the elusive Brown Trout and had a spectacular day. Yes, there is life after hearing your name and cancer in the same sentence.
Mike
Congratulations Terry.Your calm and clear thinking has been an inspiration. My own memorable date was in November 2006. If only I had known then what I have learned since! I watched and waited with PSA of 1.75 and Gleason 3+3 in 4 needles out of 34 (yep 34 in 2 biopsies) with less than 5 per cent positive in 2, and 2 per cent in the other two,for 9 months and then panicked myself into surgery. One botched robotic later and now I am doing the watching and waiting I should have done in the first place. To add insult to injury (literally!), the top man I now have thinks that my post op pathology suggests that I had insignificant cancer.
Talk about sledgehammers to crack nuts - even if they are walnuts!
Yes, yours is a terrible story - and I place the blame firmly at the door of 'surgery addicted' urologists.
I thank my lucky stars that my tumour was so advanced, because if I had been diagnosed very early on, I too would probably have been panicked into having the prostate removed.
The urologist who did my biospy is notorious for pushing guys towards removal. My brother-in-law was diagnosed 6 months after me, with a pretty low set of numbers, and he rang me in panic after he was advised to have the operation.
By then I had learned enough about options to be able to show him all the choices available. He opted for brachytherapy and is still doing very well four years later.
A few years ago I posted on Yana and on other international sites a question about just how many men with PCa were treated solely by urologists. The response was shocking. Huge numbers of men around the globe never get to see an oncologist speacialising in PCa.
We have all read story after story about the awful side effects which can occur after surgery - and just how often the cancer isn't eradicated anyway, meaning PSA rises again, and choices become limited and dangerous.
I am deeply saddened - and angry when I read how a guy like yourself has been treated.
