I can totally relate. However it is my father that is bi-polar. My mother divorced him when I was 8. He had been doing really well the past 7 years or so, but recently started doing drugs AGAIN, his new wife is divorcing him, he lost his job and now comes to my house everyday asking for money. I love him very much, but I'm like you I don't want my kids to experience the same things I did growing up. I too worry that they might carry the gene. I guess only time will tell. My father is the only one diagnosed with bi polar disorder in my family for several generations. Hopefully it will skip several SEVERAL more!