Welcome to Adult Children of Mentally ill Parents Discussion Forum!!! Dedicated to the validatation and encouragement towards one another in tranquil and perilous times a mist the obscure insanity of a loved one.
It's great that you're reaching out. I am sure that you have had a deep bond with your biological mother at some level all these years. I was separated from my dad at age 6 (never saw again) and I feel my connection with him very strongly. It's like an ache that I have for a person I was never able to grow up with, though in some way I was supposed to. I think our bond with our parents is very powerful, even if they act as our parents for only a short while.
Have you been able to grieve your loss? Do you have a support network to help you?