I've grown up with a mother who is a paranoid schizophrenic pharmacist. as a child i remember her yelling at the walls, getting into fights with family members, embarasing me in with public outbursts, and going through a period of alchohol abuse. In my teen years she she accused my father of sexually molesting my brother and i, when it was her that made some sickening approaches on me because of the voices in her head telling her to do so. The psychiatrists we took her to would either get scared of her or just give us a terrible prognosis that things would only get worse. The reason i mention that she is a pharmacist, is that a paranoid pharmacist will always think they are receiving nothing but the side effects of the medication. The crazy thing is, I fell in love with a girl that reminded me of what my mom was like when she was having a good day, but also had a lot of the same mental problems. I guess I thought i could save her, but it turns out i only made things worse. I am now 24 years old and just had to move back home because financial problems. I have been sinking further and further into a deep depression after losing the girl of my dreams and having to come back home to my sick mother. I am planning on going back to school, but I am afraid that my depression will just make me drop the classes. I have a bitter regard towards psychiatrists because all of the money spent on mental institiutions for my mother. The one time I went to a psychiatrist he was dumbfounded and recomended me to another person. I know there are plenty of people that have gone through these things. It would be nice to have an online chat

I have a father that has bipolar disorder and a mother who enables him at his worst. I can empathize with your situation because they are both very high functioning and manipulative. Others do not know that they are the people that they are. Please feel free to email me.

Aimee

If I was you, I'd really hunt for another place to live, because for me there is something about being near a toxic family that can have emotionally challenging effects.

I too have dumbfounded shrinks, and feel the important thing is to not give up, and to keep looking for the right one, that can validate your experiences. I know it's hard, because realistically there aren't that many folks out there that know what it's like to be in the mist of a parent's episode that involves talking to imaginary people or things on the walls!!!!!!! Much less how terrofying it is to be in a motor vehicle, when he/she is hearing voices and yelling at those invisible people!!!!!!!!!

My approach is, if they want to live that way, so be it, but I've got my life to live and cannot as an adult be responsible for my parent's action(s). I useto alaways fear the suicide threat, but have since over come my fear, and really try to tell myself that Im Not Responsible What ever happens........

One local Community Mental Health Center should offer free couseling. Check it out, it might even be sliding scale based. The main point s to help your self, something I was never taught, because aw, it was alaways about my parent and those escapades!!!!!!!

For me depression has been normal for me all of my life, and have accepted that that is a part of my personality that Im not ashamed of. However to keep it in check, I look for warning signs that tell me Im overboard like suicidal thoughts. Those are Red Flags for me, and have learned to imediately get into couseling ASAP, regardless of who I doubfound, because that's when I know myself needs emotional support.

Now as far as relationships are concerned, be emotionally careful, you have You to take care of! The last thing you need is a dysfunctional relationship, and then children on top of that, then a nasty divorce, oh, it can alaways be worse!!!!!!!! It's better to be alone, without the drama. I think it's especially hard for us to distingush characters when one's parent has been so difficult to deal with, but in time one dose get the idea of what the world terms as "normal".

Take Care Of Number 1 YOU!!!!!!