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I used to write limericks - here are four

A junkie I am on the net.
My puter's becoming a pet.
This morning, my wife
Yelled,"You get a life!"
But I haven't downloaded one yet.

The world is a sick place indeed;
It's governed by power and greed.
If your aim is set
On the justice you'll get . . .
Your checkbook is all that you need.

I don't like to figure my tax.
It ****** me off to the max.
Some day I might snap,
An agent I'll zap,
And chop up his desk with an axe !

One beautiful night, on my Sporty,
I went for a ride, just a shorty.
I lost some poor cop
When he tried to stop
Me for going a hundred and forty !